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She can go back to her husband when we’re done making love, right? The problem comes in when over time an attachment forms between the married woman and her ‘other man.’ Now she is growing used to the arrangement and has convinced herself that the triangle makes her disappointing marriage tolerable.If the ‘other man’ gets attached he will inevitably at some point start needing more from the married woman. My heart goes out to him more than any one else in this arrangement because he is usually the one who gets disturbed first and has more to lose.All three people in this triangular arrangement have their issues.Let’s do one at a time starting with the ‘other man.’ He is definitely looking for love in the wrong place and with the wrong person.His superficial belief that he wants someone else’s woman for the convenience is a lie he defensively tells himself.
Most people I’ve met who are afraid of intimacy, lose the fear when they accept and feel better about themselves.
Triangles exist simply because a problem is not being resolved in a marriage.
Two people get married and have marital problems, instead of resolving those problems either by fixing the relationship or ending it, which by the way can be a valid resolution of a problem, a third party is brought into the relationship, and now you have a triangle.
In some instances he ‘knows’ his wife is cheating on him and looks the other way.
In other instances his defenses are so thick he doesn’t read the signs at least consciously.
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I know the story books tell us that it’s better to stay together.